Close up.

My wife and I were sitting in our new flat, catching our breath after the move. It had been demanding, both physically and emotionally. Mostly for me, of course, but as we sat among the packing boxes surveying our new home, it finally felt like we'd landed. We'd cracked open a bottle of red and started unpacking when my wife found an old photo album.

-Never seen this before.

-Sod that. I meant to bin it.

I reach for the album, but she twists away and opens it.

-Are you mad? You can't just chuck away part of your life!

She flicks through a few pages and chuckles. Meanwhile, I'm going clammy.

-Christ, look at you here - so sweet! Is this pre-uni?

-Dunno, love, just give it here...

-No, I want to see, she replies, turning another page.

-Please, darling...

Suddenly I notice my wife stiffen.

-Who's this then? she says in that icy tone.

-Who?

-The woman posing starkers in a bed.

-Right... don't recall that, I say, feigning nonchalance.

-Can't even remember her name?

-Come on, it was ages ago...

I hear my voice crack as she turns another page.

-Good grief, these are proper porn shots.

-No they're bloody not!

-Then what's this? She thrusts the album at me.

-She wanted me to take the photos!

-Naturally.

-Just for laughs... let's chuck it...

-Yes - question is why you didn't years ago?

-Oh bollocks! It's been in the loft forever. I even forgot it existed.

My wife flips to the next photo and holds it up.

-Forgot? I find that very hard to believe.

I shamefully avert my gaze. I'd also forgotten I once owned a macro lens for extreme close-ups.